Baby Creative's Blog

The fact of the matter is that all the environmental problems we are facing are due to one simple problem. No, it’s not greedy Americans. It’s too many people and not enough planet; the population keeps getting bigger and, funnily enough, the earth doesn’t. Something has to give.

So what do we do about it? Short of reaching another planet fit for human habitation, which we’ll leave to NASA, the solution has to come on the population side.

Well, we could take a leaf out of Adolf Hitler’s book and start culling various races, but people probably wouldn’t like that, especially if they were the unlucky ones. You’d probably end up with a World War, which, although a good population-culler, we’d probably lose, and it’d all be for nothing.

So let’s get creative and ask. What do we know?

Some people breed more than others, and it’s those ones that are the problem. We know that, generally, the poor are the breeders. The rich don’t breed so much. And rightly so – they don’t want to give up their privileged existences to care for selfish and greedy sprogs. For the poor and the weak though, breeding is a survival strategy. It’s something to do if you don’t have a telly, and they can always help out around the farm and keep their parents in old age.

So how do we solve the problem?

Easy. Make breeding a financial concern. Give everyone in the world “no-child benefit”, and remove it as they have children. Of course, we still need new people, or else we’ll run out quite quickly. So, everyone is allowed one child for free, and we guess that you’d have to be allowed to replace it if it died. A second child, however, leads to a fifty percent reduction in your benefits. A third halves it again, and so on.

You’d have to make sure that the no-child benefit was enough to live on, and that the fifty percent reduction wasn’t. With a little financial tinkering, though, you’d make sure that population growth slowed down to neutral. Adjustments could be made to make sure it never quite became negative and never rocketed as it has been allowed to do before.

Then, we could leave the few areas of the world we haven’t spoiled yet untouched, leave a few resources in the ground, and there wouldn’t be a need for such huge production as countries developed and populations boomed.

We’re not against the expansion of the race, we’ve just run out of room, and it’s time to accept that.